How it works

A situation, then every way through it.

Each session follows the same four steps. The method has a name and a framework behind it, but the steps are what your child actually experiences.

Illustration: an empty room set up for a session, a circle of chairs facing a whiteboard
In four steps

What actually happens in a session.

The same structure from age 6 to 16, scaled in complexity, not in principle. It is a loop, not a ladder: the cohort runs it again the next week, with a new situation.

The HiddenOptions Method

  1. A real situation

    Delivered through video, audio, live enactment, observation or a hands-on setup.

  2. Map the options

    Children name every option they can see. The facilitator maps them live, then reveals the ones nobody named.

  3. Test the responses

    Guided role-play, playing out what each choice would really cause — and how context changes it.

  4. Practice for real

    Each child leaves with one transfer goal to try before the next session. Progress is tracked.

The mental model

Every situation has three doors.

Most people default to Door 2 without realizing it. Most hidden options live behind Door 1. Door 3 is almost always overlooked. We teach children to see all three — and choose deliberately.

Door 1 · Face It
Engage directly
The door with the most hidden options — and the one most kids avoid instinctively.
Examples
  • Talk to the person
  • Set a boundary
  • Ask for help
Most avoided · Most rewarding
Door 2 · Step Away
Create distance
The default — chosen by most people, often without realizing it. Sometimes right, often just a habit.
Examples
  • Ignore it
  • Walk away
  • Change the subject
Most common default
Door 3 · Accept
Accept it and move on
The Stoic door. You can't always change what happened — but you can always choose how you respond.
Examples
  • Let it go
  • Reframe it
  • Choose your attitude
Almost always overlooked

Click any door to open it.

See whether it clicks for your child.

Four steps, three doors, once a week across a 4-week cycle, in a cohort of 5–10 in Redmond, WA. Tell us your child's age and we'll be in touch when the next cohort in their track opens.

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